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Roadkill Plush

Ran-over soft toys (Rabbit and Racoon) in a body bag with certificate of death.

  • Run-over soft toys in a body bag with certificate of death.
  • Available as racoon (Twitch), rabbit (Grind) or hedgehog (Splodge).

Roadkill Plush

Ran-over soft toys (Rabbit and Racoon) in a body bag with certificate of death.

article no. 6813

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29,95 € *

* incl. VAT. plus Shipping costs

Description: Roadkill Plush

  • Run-over soft toys in a body bag with certificate of death.
  • Available as racoon (Twitch), rabbit (Grind) or hedgehog (Splodge).

England... land of red busses, black taxis, afternoon tea and fish n chips! A land full of polite, normal and sane people... right?

Well, maybe not! You see, three guys, Adam, Mike and Charlie are a bit... shall we say, 'off their rockers'! These guys are real plush-toy-geeks who find ordinary teddy bears rather boring. So what did they up and do...? Well, they created a new kind of cuddly stuffed animal – the Roadkill Plush.

Roadkill Plushes are really unique, and actually so absolutely bizarre we think they'll be very well received by all lovers of abnormal abnormalities (can we say that?!), because they're definitely a case for the cabinet of curiosities!

We offer these plush toys in three different versions: Twitch, the Racoon, Grind, the Rabbit and Splodge, the Hedgehog.

Racoon Twitch:
Twitch, after a head-on collision with a green Ford Mondeo, died on 17th March 2007 aged 5. You can clearly see the tire marks on the fur on his back. His oozing intestines (on both sides) are an obvious sign that Twitch is no longer among the living. If necessary (e.g. if children are attendant), you can squeeze his innards into his abdominal cavity and close it with a zipper. He leaves behind his parents and his friend Grind (tho the poor rabbit will follow him to the happy hopping grounds 3 short months later).

Rabbit Grind:
Grind passed away on 3rd June 2007 aged 4, after being flattened by a Skandia Juggernaut. He was dead on the spot (and everywhere else!). All efforts to reanimate him would have been in vain because he would have needed a full transplant of all inner organs – sadly not really possible, not to mention the fact there was no donor rabbit available or willing to step up. Poor Grind, everything a rabbit needs to maintain his vital functions, like liver and bowls, is lying on the floor next to him – but you can stow this stuff away in his tummy (although this doesn't make the mess too much better!).

Hedgehog Splodge:
After a freak accident on Silverstone Racetrack involving Jensen Button's Honda, Splodge passed away on 14th July 2007, aged 2. The beloved son of Nigel and Sally Hedgehog, Splodge was born on 29th April 2005. He was educated at Herts College, where he took an NVQ in joinery. Very popular in the hedgerows of Hertfordshire, Splodge loved indulging his hobbies of rollerblading and kite-flying. His next of kin, Pop the Weasel, will be holding a private ceremony for close friends at Moors Farm, Bracklebury, on 23rd July 2007. Bread and milk will be laid on.

All seriously dead plush animals have been packed into a dignified body bag, along with a certificate of death and a 'toe tag' attached to the body bag's zipper (in absence of a real toe!).

Give Twitch, Grind and Splodge, in bittersweet memory of all the poor nameless animals who die on the roads every day, a place in your home. According to the saying "de mortuis nihil nisi bene"*, you shall cherish their past lives and grieve the manner of their deaths. You shall cuddle them reverently from time to time and present them respectfully to your friends so you'll be able to think of the transience of life together.

*One should only speak well of the dead

Technical details
  • content : Soft toy, body bag, certificate of death.
  • care and maintenance : hand wash only
  • Material : 100% polyester
  • Dimensions : length: 35cm, width 20cm, height: 11cm
  • Capacity : With foldout-guts on the side (racoon Twitch and hedgehog Splodge also with zipper).